Last week, on a thirty-minute break in the studio, the Wave God himself FaceTimed me to talk movies. The last time we had seen each other was in 2009, when Eric and I brought a Scrabble board up to his apartment in the Bronx — our sketch went viral and was beloved by ASAP Mob and Mac Miller. That was right before he went away for 16 years — but it’s nice to see him in good spirits, talking about The Notebook, Chuck Norris and why American Pie 3 is the best of the bunch. And, of course, I got to hear his trademark laugh. A lot!
What’s a good date movie?
The Notebook.
Really? How many times have you seen it?
I can’t count.
I can’t tell if you’re being serious.
I cried the first time I watched The Notebook. I got emotional.
Wow. So, I’ve actually never seen it — don’t know if I will, don’t know if you’d spoil it for me. But I’m guessing somebody dies at the end?
Just watch it, man. Try to get with a girl who hasn’t watched it. Or — oh! Matter fact, I got something better for you. You get with a girl that has watched it. And you tell her that you wanna watch it, that Max B told you to watch it. And she’s gonna instruct you through the movie. That’s gonna give you the edge.
What’s a popular movie that you’ve never seen?
I don’t know. I think every movie I’ve wanted to see, I’ve seen it. And I’m at the point now where, for me to sit down in front of the TV and watch a movie, it’s got to really stimulate my brain. That shit’s really gotta have some shit going on. Or it’s gotta be a super retro violent throwback action movie — like I’m gonna watch Invasion USA with Chuck Norris. That’s gonna be my next go-to movie.
All I want is a good quality movie. Just some good shit that’s gonna stimulate me. If it’s funny, I want it to be funny. If it’s dramatic, I want it to dramatic. If it’s violent, I want it to be violent. If it’s scary, I want it to be fucking crazy. And I don’t like ghost movies.
You don’t like ghost movies.
I’m not a superstitious ghost guy, no. I don’t like ghost stories.
Like?
I’ve watched a couple, I don’t like ‘em. I don’t believe in them. Annabelle, all that type of shit.
What’s a movie that you love?
New Jack City. The culture, the time, the area, the storyline. Everything. The characters. That’s the only movie I’m like, “Yo, throw that on.” I want to learn every word at some point. Last Dragon, too.
Do you like New Jack City because it’s an accurate depiction of the Harlem you grew up in?
It’s a nostalgia thing. But it’s everything in one: it’s comedy, it’s funny, it’s betrayal, it’s love, it’s lust. It’s camaraderie. Everything’s in there.
Do you remember them actually filming, seeing the sets and everything?
Absolutely. We was trying to see Tupac — we thought he was in the trailer. We was trying to see Tupac. Hell yeah! We was outside for that! Back to the original question, movies I love, I watched Scarface so much I created a part 2, that I won’t share, unless…you gotta sign an NDA for me to share that part 2.
Word?
Man, I got something special. I could open Scarface so nice. Y’all wouldn’t believe it.
What was the prison movie situation like?
It depended. We always had movies in prison. Some prisons we was in, we did three movies a day; a movie every day; different movies. We did B-movies, A-movies…all types of movies.
What’s one that you probably never would’ve seen if not for someone suggesting it?
I watched this one about these guys who were all trapped in a bunker. Yo, it was fucking sick. There were 10 people in a bunker in the apocalypse and you watch what happens.
I’m looking up “bunker movie.”
(laughs like a lawnmower) I’ll know it when I hear it.
Is it The Bunker?
No.
Then I don’t know.
What’s a movie with incredible visuals?
The Revenant, where Leonardo climbs inside the bear. And he falls off the cliff with the horse. Awesome, awesome.
What’s a movie you quote a lot?
Man, I quote a lot of New Jack City, man. You know, actually, I can’t say what I quote a lot. It’s whatever pops up. I have that option, I have that know-about, to where if something comes up and I heard it, I can reference it from my library.
Is there a movie where you only quote one line?
“I’m putting cases on all you bitches!”
(laughs for 10 seconds straight, sounding like frogs around a pond on a hot summer night) That line was so hard!
What’s a great bad movie?
I watched the — what’s the guy that plays Thanos?
Josh Brolin.
Josh Brolin played in a movie where he’s locked in his room. They lock him in this room, he’s this real asshole. He thinks he’s in this room, they knock him out, they drug him, he’s in this room for years and years and years.
You’re talking about Oldboy.
Oldboy! So now you see my level of good-bad movies.
Yea, but like, did you see the original?
You’re right, there is two movies. I haven’t seen it but I saw it when I was looking up that version — I seen that one next to it. I didn’t know if that was the same actual movie. Should I check it out?
The original is fantastic!
Okay, I’ll watch the original.
Yea, you’ve gotta see it. Not only is it influential, but it’s one of those ones. The way the story unfolds, the way that guy fights his way out — it’s incredible.
What’s your go-to comedy?
Chappelle Show. I’m talking about — when I want a good, clean, hard laugh, I fuck with Chappelle. I could just throw it on any time. If it’s a movie, I thought Step Brothers was awesome. I thought Wedding Crashers was awesome. Those are my two go-to’s. And, even though they’re a little old now, the first three American Pies: classic.
Wait, wait, wait: you like 2 and 3???
I love 1, 2 and 3. I thought 3 was the funniest one. 3 was tough. 3 was fucking insane crazy.
But 1 was world-changing.
1 was world-changing but when I watched it when I was older, it didn’t really give the same effect. 2 did the same thing. When I watched 3 recently, I almost peed on myself. (laughs like an electric toothbrush)
We’ve been having a conversation on the showcast: whose career is better, Will Ferrell or Seth Rogan? Not who’s funnier — whose career is better?
I think they’re both great comedians. Seth is more of a writer, behind-the-scenes as well. So he may have a little more — you know what I’m saying? But the movies, quantity and quality? I’m gonna go with Will Ferrell. Not by far, though.
What about Jim Carrey or Adam Sandler?
Jim Carrey, by far. And Jim Carrey — now he’s not even doing so much funny movies lately. He’s doing different roles, ones that you don’t even know they’re him until you see the credits. So that’s how great he is. Jim Carrey, by far.
Do you like his dramatic work?
I love his dramatic work. I loved him in Kick-Ass 2. Yea! I’m involved, buddy!
What’d you think of Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind?
What’s that, explain that?
It’s where Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet have a terrible break-up and then she undergoes an operation to have her mind erased, to forget the entire relationship: all the bad but also the good of it. But obviously things get complicated from there.
Oh! It’s kinda old, I know what you’re talking about. That was actually one of his first roles outside the comedy stuff. I just never seen it but I know what you’re talking about.
Yea, that one and Truman Show were around the same time.
Love Truman Show. Love Cable Guy. Cable Guy was my shit too.
Where do you sit in a movie theatre?
It don’t matter. As long as I’m not in the direct front row, I be alright.
You don’t mind aisle, middle, any of that.
Don’t mind. I really don’t even care about movie theatres. I’m a big popcorn guy — I just go for the popcorn. The popcorn and the blowjob, that’s it.
Yea? You’re a simple man: simple man, simple pleasures. That’s all you need.
That’s all I need.
Would you rather stream a movie or go to the theatre?
I mean, it don’t really matter to me. I like watching shit in my crib, in my bed. I rather stream. But like I said, I love the popcorn, I love the blowjob. When I come through the movies, it’s not me and a bunch of dudes. It’s a date with me. (laughs like the suction thing at the dentist’s office)
Who’s an actor you think should get more shine?
I think Zendaya should get more shine. I think Jamie Foxx is underrated!
Jamie should’ve won for Django!
He should’ve won for Django. Leo’s one of my favorite actors — yea, he’s my favorite actor. The females? Hm. I love the ladies — I think I love the older actresses. I was big on Sharon Stone, I was big on Meryl Streep. I love Glenn Close. I’m talking about, these are real actresses. Julia Roberts. These women could do some stuff.
What’s your favorite Julia Roberts movie?
(exhales) I love the Oceans series. I’m a big Oceans guy. None of my friends watch it, none of my family watches it. I tell them, “This the shit,” they’ll be like, “Nawww.” So I’m a big Oceans guy. I always thought Julia Roberts was gorgeous. She got a mouth on her, boy! (laughs like a phone on vibrate)
What’s your favorite crew in movies? Would it be the Oceans cast?
That’s a good question. My favorite crew…you had Heist. Gene Hackman, the Black guy from Malcolm X, Archie. The other white guy, Spade something? No, not David Spade…the other guy, he’s in a few other movies. And you had Danny Devito. Man, man, man. The writing, the jargon they had going on in there was crazy. They using words like “lame,” they’re calling each other “herb.” Wild shit.
“Herb” is my favorite shit to say!
I was dying. (laughs like a car engine turning over) That Triple 9 crew was crazy, too. Den of Thieves crew was crazy too — the white boy was crazy, bro. He was insane, bro.
What was your favorite movie of last year?
Mad Max. Or Weapons. Weapons was sick, and I knew there was more to it — but I was trying to figure out where the lady came from and stuff like that.
I saw it three times, but the first time I saw it, I just kept thinking, “Damn. That’s it? It’s just a random occurrence in this town? There’s no backstory?”
Yea! Thank you! Exactly. It was some witchcraft shit, though.
It’s supposed to be a deeper thing about school violence.
Yea, and something happened with her to make her stop fucking with them. Maybe something happened to her kid or something.
How did you first meet The LOX?
First time I met the LOX, we was in DC, 2005. I had only been going on the road for three or four months, that point. And we did a Sweet Sixteen concert or whatever. And I was standing right there, next to Jim Jones. Styles and them came out and was like, “Yo, where’s Max at?” They didn’t even see me, they walked right past me. Jim was like, “He’s right here.” “Oh, shit!” And we just dapped it up, gave each other our props and shit. And we’ve been cool ever since.
You were just like, fresh out.
Soon as I did “G’s Up,” I met them.
That’s all I’ve got. Max, this has been a real pleasure to reconnect with you. Glad to see you out and about.
I’m very informative, ain’t I?
You’re one of one.
Call me and thank me when you get that date poppin’, she’s gonna be showing you things you never seen. You’re gonna say “Thank you, Biggavell, you got me laid!”
Thank you Biggavell
I read “The Notebook” and watched the movie. They both have different endings.